But let me tell you, sweet friends. This takes work. Sweat. Tears. Laughter. Wrestling. Questioning. Studying. Meditating. Memorizing. Prayer. And so forth. It's not something that comes natural, especially in the flesh.
I'll be honest and say that this "revelation" of mine, if you will, is very recent. But it is honest and true.
In pursuing this for my own life, I have challenged "my girls" to do the same. That we, as a girls ministry, would be set apart. That they too would pursue this kind of lifestyle. Even at the age of 11 or 17.
I know I haven't given y'all a recent update on my job, but I hope you know that I am absolutely LOVING it. Yes, it has kept me as busy as a bumblebee, and yes, it has kept me on my knees for this generation of girls (that I am not much older than) that is SURROUNDED by lies. Oh, the lies. But it is worth every second.
But, I'll be honest and tell you that I have questioned this job. (Don't get me wrong, I haven't thought about quitting. No ma'am!) But, it is a bit overwhelming at times. Sometimes I don't even know where to start. I wonder if the Lord picked the right person by placing me here! (Because you know, I was confident in teaching. Girls Ministry Director? Not so much!) Especially with this whole ministry thing! You mean to tell me that I signed up for this?!
But then I am reminded by comments, posts, emails and conversations that encourage me to no end. That remind me why I am here, for such a time as this. That truly in my singleness there is NO other place I'd rather be. For real. Not to say I won't do this when I'm married, but I know without a shadow of a doubt I couldn't give it my all as much as I am now. And it is all worth it.
Which also reminds me that HE placed me here, instead of teaching, and that HE is working everything out through me. That if I give Him the Girls Ministry at Cypress Bible, and commit it to Him, then I just get to tag along. He reminds me that I cannot do this on my own, and if I even try to, it will without a doubt, flop. He keeps humbling me, and I keep asking Him to.
So instead of constantly (we're working on this) worrying about who I will marry, or when it will happen, I want to use this time of singleness to it's greatest potential. That I wouldn't look back on it and think I should have done more. That I would give my all to these girls. He has given me this responsibility, and I am accountable to Him for what I choose to do in this time.
I can throw myself a pity party. I can complain about my life all I want. I can want this or that all the time. Or I can embrace this time and truly glorify my wonderful God. The latter sounds so much better. I am tired of wallowing and worrying.
Y'all this is my constant prayer and my constant idol. Thank you, No Other Gods!
Serious, being married, or wanting to be married is an idol that I have to shake. It gets in the way of many things. No, it is not bad to want to be married. And it's not bad to think about it. But if I am thinking about THAT more than I am the Lord. Oh bless. Houston, we have a problem.
This is me, confessing to you, that I want to be a Lily Among the Thorns. That I want to pursue Jesus with all I have. That I want the girls ministry at Cypress to be a thriving one. Not because of me, but because God is amazing and can do more than we can imagine.
With that said, I just recenetly started a blog for the girls. I am so excited! Go HERE to check it out. I am SO excited for what the Lord has planned for my time here. I don't know how long it will be or what it will look like, but He does. I trust that He will work this thing out for His glory!
Lord, thank you for allowing me to have this opportunity in my life to pour into these girls, like I had girls pour into me. I pray that I would only be a vessel and that you would move me out of the way. That I would constantly be reminded of the need for you in my life and in the ministry. That if it truly is mine, that it would flop. Lord, I pray that you would richly bless this time of singleness and that I would embrace it. You know the plans you have for me Lord. I need only to trust you! I love you so much!
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12 comments:
Linds,
I cannot help but read your post, know what I know about your life, and almost cry:) But happiness girl, seriously:)
You and I are not that much different, are we:)
Your aspirations to teach, you met the goal, and not have been taken by the hand of Jesus over the water, into the next part of life...which includes ministry, I am SO excited to see where He will take you next!
You inspire me girl, I mean the enemy likes to whisper in my ear sometimes, " See, you could never do that, or be like that."
and I let those lies deceive my vision, but because of my blog siestas, because of little blessings here and there, and because of GOD'S love...I stay grounded.
I'm engaged to be married, but let me tell you, that doesn't make it easier to reach a goal of marriage, it makes it HARDER..think about it.
Anyway, I love you:)
If this is a little wordy, keep in mind I have been sleeping since 3pm yesterday,and its now 4:46am:)
Be Blessed:)
Ang
Oh Lindsee...I want to encourage you like no other! I know the difficulty. I know the wrestling matches. I know the worry and wonder too. But, you nailed it girlfriend when you said I have to give it over to God daily. And, every single detail of what you are planning and doing. And, ask for that filling of His Spirit on an hour basis if you need too! :)
He loves you so much....and He's thrilled with your ministry.
Always in my prayers~
Fran
All I can say is thank you, because I so needed to hear this as well. Amanda at Baby Bangs posted... yesterday? about kind of the same thing - enjoying your twenties before you have a family and really giving it all to God. I haven't been doing that, and reading No Other Gods has given me such a start! I put SO many things before Him - my weight, marriage, even shopping and TV! I, too, want to be a lily among the thorns, and you, little Lindsee, are SUCH a blessing.
Press on girl! "And who knows whether you have not come to this place for such a time as this?" Esther 4:14
Enjoy every second of where God has you right now!!!
Lindsee
How I wish I was as mature in my Christian walk when I was your age - oh girl!
I was just talking about being set apart with my boys
My oldest is at the age where he says things without thinking and I have been trying teach him that we want people to see us as different and that means we can not talk or sound like everyone else
Lindsee - you are such a blessing to so many including us bloggy friends but I can only imagine how you inspire and encourage the girls you work with :)
God bless you
Kim
Oh no, no, it is YOU that are an encouragement!:-)
Let's get together.
Praying for you.
We need to have lunch my Friend! or you can come over and chat while I paint my parents' house! I would love it!
Hi Lindsee~ I found your blog through Amanda Jones' and your blog and hers have spoken to me with your last post. I am 25 and single and not enjoying it. I am ready to be married but God is not ready for me to be apparently. I am trying to figure out what God wants me to do in his ministry for him through my singleness. I am a preschool teacher and yes I love teaching but I think "i could do that married." so, thank you for writing this post and thank you amanda for writing one like it at the same time. :)
i have a blog but it is private. if you want to read it email me at nrs8301@gmail.com and ill add you to my list. ~Nicole
Linds...come to my blog. I need your help with something.
Thanks babe!
:)Ang
me, you, debra, (and nancy-if she can) need a get together- a meet in the middle of all of us and just stop to talk! I'd LOVE that!!!
Missing you and keep at it...He has great things in store- more than your mind can fathom- I can't wait to see how He uses you to bring Him glory in so many ways! love ya!
Linds, I love your humble heart. You are asking the right questions...I asked the wrong ones for way too many years even in passion and intrigue. But passion doesn't help us find God like returning and repentance. Take your words to HIM. Take words. Your beauty pours out of you into me and I'm so grateful to hear your heart. Isaiah 30:18
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